First of all, both Bob and Lori Hollander are trained psychotherapists. You will be receiving expert relationship help from licensed professionals with solid credentials who participate in ongoing relationship therapy education themselves.
We use a coaching approach to relationship work because of coaching’s powerful ability to fast-forward action and change. Coaching is rooted in the present and is a deliberate process that uses clear, specific goals and highly focused conversations. An environment is created that supports personal and relational growth, purposeful action and sustained improvement. Though the past may be discussed, it is addressed only in the context of discovering what is blocking the client from moving forward.
In contrast, therapy focuses on the diagnosis and treatment of emotional illness and unresolved psychological issues from the past. The focus is on symptoms and problems for which the client is seeking relief, healing, coping skills and solutions. In coaching clients may be seeking solutions, but they are more often seeking to enhance their performance (and sometimes reach excellence) in a given area of their life.
A coach is seen as a person possessing a set of skills used to support people in achieving their goals. Here the expert is the client with the coach providing encouragement. The coach consults with the client weekly to review progress, identify roadblocks and clarify the vision for the future. Assuming an actively engaged partnership role with the client, the coach is more self-revealing. Regular sessions are combined with telephone and e-mail contacts as needed in a fluid and flexible model.
In therapy, the therapist is presumed to be the expert and leads the client on a path toward improvement. Clients meet with the therapist once a week for an hourly session in a more rigid model. The therapist is less self-revealing and the relationship is more hierarchical than level.
At Relationships Work, we are therapists who primarily use a coaching approach. In active, flexible and engaging partnership with our clients, we help couples set goals and support them in learning and practicing the skills to achieve them so that their relationship is transformed.