Dawn: Andy, all we do is argue! Don’t you see that we can’t figure this out by ourselves? We need a counselor. Andy: No way. I won’t tell a stranger all our private stuff. What do you do when you and your partner go round and round arguing about the same things? You know the [...]

The success of marriage comes not in finding the “right” person, but in the ability of both partners to adjust to the real person they inevitably realize they married. – John Fischer Ever wonder why we idealize our partner at the beginning of a relationship and overlook, ignore or deny the things we don’t like? [...]

Monday morning at the Hollanders office: 9 a.m. – Megan comes to counseling alone, “I want to work on our relationship but my husband refuses to come to counseling. He won’t even engage in a real discussion about ‘us’ because ‘we shouldn’t have to work on it.’ It feels like I’m the only one doing [...]

“I’ve asked my partner for the last two years to come to marriage counseling with me, but he refuses. I don’t understand why he is so adamant.” If we had a penny for every time we’ve heard that in the last 22 years, we’d be rich. There are many reasons that partners do not want [...]

“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players….” was written by Shakespeare, but this writer of plays and beautiful sonnets about “living and loving” left out one important factor, which is that though in a relationship there are indeed two players, both players often participate simultaneously in two “different” plays [...]

During this past month, we took you on a ride down Extraordinary Relationship Lane, where we visited the three critical stops along your journey to move your partnership to extraordinary: 1) Conscious and Active Co-Creation 2) Courageous Awareness and Compassionate Understanding of Self & Partner 3) Vital Connection in Head, Heart & Hormones To help [...]