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October 28, 2009: Reading to Forgive After An Affair

Before a betrayed partner can let go and forgive, he needs to make sense of what happened – and sometimes talking is not enough. Bibliotherapy, or reading therapy, as an adjunct to counseling has been shown to speed the recovery process significantly. And it increases the odds of maintaining progress once therapy has ended. Prescribing self-help books between therapy sessions is an important tool to support the work that couples do when healing from an affair.

Here are some of the books we highly recommend reading to understand affairs and the process of forgiving:

After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful
– Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D.

Not “Just Friends”: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity
– Shirley Glass, Ph.D.

Getting Past the Affair: A Program to Help You Cope, Heal and Move On
– Together or Apart - Douglas K. Snyder, Ph.D., Donald H. Baucom, Ph.D. Kristina Coop Gordon, Ph.D.

The Monogamy Myth, A Personal Handbook for Recovering from Affairs
- Peggy Vaughan, Founder of BAN (Beyond Affairs Network support group)

Surviving Infidelity: Making Decisions, Recovering from the Pain
- Rona Subotnik, MFCC, Gloria G. Harris, Ph.D.

My Husband’s Affair Became the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me
- Anne Brecht

How Can I Forgive You?: The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To
– Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D.

We would love to hear which books you have found helpful and would recommend to others in our relationship community. Email Lori at LHollander@RelationshipsWork.com with the name of the book and your thoughts.

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